"I'm going to speak my mind because I have nothing to lose."--S.I. Hayakawa
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Thursday, December 22, 2011

Did Jeff Foxworthy really say this?


 This was re-posted on a friend's Facebook page.  I don't know if Jeff Foxworthy really wrote it or note, but it's so spot on, I thought I'd share it.  You know Jeff Foxworthy, don't you?  He of, "You might be a redneck if..."

What Jeff Foxworthy has to say about Alaskans:
 
If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and he doesn't work there, you may live in Alaska.
If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you may live in Alaska.
If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you may live in Alaska.
If you measure distance in hours, you may live in Alaska.
If you know several people who have hit a moose more than once, you may live in Alaska.
If you have switched from 'heat' to 'A/C' in the same day and back again, you may live in Alaska.  (Okay, this one I question.  I don't know anyone who has air conditioning.  We just open windows.)
If you can drive 75 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching, you may live in Alaska.
If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked, you may live in Alaska.
If you carry jumpers in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you may live in Alaska.  (Along with a tow strap, emergency fusees, and blankets.)
If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit, you may live in Alaska.
If the speed limit on the highway is 55 mph -- you're going 80 and everybody is passing you, you may live in Alaska.
If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow, you may live in Alaska.
If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction, you may live in Alaska.
If you have more miles on your snow blower than your car, you may live in Alaska.
If you find 10 degrees 'a little chilly', you may live in Alaska.
If you actually understand these jokes, you definitely live in Alaska

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