"I'm going to speak my mind because I have nothing to lose."--S.I. Hayakawa

Thursday, July 26, 2012

Those #&%@^# Visitors

You know how they are.  They overstay their welcome, eat everything in sight, and don't help out.

The salmon are in the streams, but do you think they'd catch one, and bring it home for dinner?  Not on your life.  Getting to where they won't even get their own meals--want you to prepare them

And then!  Just when you're at your wits end and about to get out the .12 gauge shotgun with the really big slugs in it, they toodle off and leave you with a big mess.  Ingrates. 

Hope's visitor tipped over her BBQ grill and didn't pick it up.  Lou and Monica"s visitor tried to make off with their smoked salmon--didn't even ask.

Erin's visitor had her so freaked she didn't dare leave the house to hang laundry outside.

But Jeff's visitor?   OMG!  The visitor from hell epitomized.

I have proof.  In living color.  Ta dah!!!

This is Jeff's car.  Jeff's a nice guy.  If anyone had asked, Jeff would have loaned out the car willingly.

So, imagine his surprise when one morning his wife asked what was wrong with his car and when Jeff went out to look, this is what he saw.

Not only was the window broken, but the door had been wrenched open.  Jeff was able to get it closed but the window frame is all catawampus and definitely not weathertight.

But that's nothing compared to the inside.

 Look at that.  He totally destroyed the rear seat.  Didn't even have the courtesy to open the trunk to get whatever it was it wanted in there.

 Then it took a big chunk out of the driver's seat.

But the scary part was what it did to the passenger seat.  Now anything that could literally bend and  break a seat like this has to be as big as ...    As big as....    Well, as big as a brown bear.

And that's exactly what it was.

It left forensic evidence.

 And then, after destroying Jeff's car for the bag of garbage that Jeff was going to take to the dumpster site the next morning, it left behind another mess for him to clean up.  Other than his car, that is.

Humph.  Well, you know what those visitors are like.